Hi there,

It's Will from Will's Personal Development Show.

In this week's dose of insights to help you reach your potential in life, I talk about the news ... Will Smith punching Chris Rock at the Oscars. Basically, he walked on stage and punched Chris after Chris made a light joke about his wife. Then, he yelled in a very aggressive way towards Chris telling him to never talk about his wife again. It was very scary and out of place.

A good portion of the world is buzzing about this celebrity news. It's relevant to us because I just spent a good amount of time rereading his latest memoir. And I've done recent and old podcasts and blog posts about Will and all his advice for success. I used to think of his as this almost infallible role model, but through his memoir, I realized he had plenty of struggles, failures, and internal issues. Check out my podcast episode if you want a longer version of what I learned and how it compares and equates to other successful people I've studied, but he battled relationship issues, feelings of cowardice, overcompensating, and childhood trauma.

Will's latest outburst at the Oscars reminds me of something I heard from Tucker Max long ago: If someone has an outsized emotional reaction towards you (e.g., rage), it usually has more to do with them than you. For a tame joke, you can tell he was triggered by something else that the joke poked. We may never know what but it definitely touched some sensitive, touchy areas.

I don't what he did was professional, and I don't think Chris's joke was out of line, but that stuff sometimes happens when you're a comedian constantly making jokes. Something's will not hit right.

Here's my candid video reaction to the event and thoughts very shortly after it happened.

What's the learning lesson from all of this? Different people are going to take different things from it, but it's a reminder that everyone has their struggles and things they're dealing with no matter how successful they may be on the surface. He won Best Actor that night, but most people aren't going to remember that. Even he probably didn't care about that since the Chris Rock thing overshadowed everything in the press. Will clearly had a lot of struggles through his life, after reading his book, and it seems he's still working through some things. It reminds me of a few people (some that went to the same school as me or just influencers I followed) over the years that have posted about their struggles with depression, anxiety, or other issues that I wouldn't never thought had issues because of how rich, famous, or attractive they were.

Another thing is that it just reminds me about what matters most in life and what you think matters most in the moment. One of Will's final chapters in the book is about death. He saw his father die and talked a lot about death, leaving a legacy, and what matters at the end of life. It was a somber, but thoughtful chapter. At the end of your life, the things that you think are so important now (punching another celeb in the face, getting an A on a test, making a lot of money, getting embarrassed because you got fired, the anxiety and worry about getting fired or failing in life) are probably not going to be at the top of your mind. The truth is that you'll probably get through life and bounce back even if these scenarios you're worried about happen. What's going to matter is how people remember you made them feel, the legacy you left behind, the things you gave back to your community.

Will's stunt was probably a step in the wrong direction in serving or building that legacy, but I think he will bounce back. It may seem like the biggest deal in the world to many people and Will and his family right now, but in the grand scheme of things, it's not. People are struggling for food and shelter in other parts of the world right now (like Ukraine). He'll get through it. He'll figure it out. We all make mistakes, even in the later years of our life. I hope he learns from it, figures out what internal issues keeps causing these outbursts, grows from this, makes amends with Chris, and continues to build the big legacy he has.

It may seem redundant or simplistic, but throughout my life and probably forever, I'll need that reminder that my woes, worries, and struggles are never that big. I often forget and for weeks and months and get caught up in some struggle that I think is a big deal. I get worried about something someone said, about someone who doesn't like me, about my lack of progress or success in some area of my life, or underperforming at work and getting fired. Many of these worries may never happen and I over stress. If you're ever in a similar place, just remember, you're not alone in your struggles. And whatever you've been through, others have been through worse. Think of the refugees of past wars. The Holocaust. Arnold Schwarzenegger said in his biography that he met these miners who would work for 12+ hours a day for $1 a day in sweltering conditions far underground and only get to see their family once a year. He said that anything better than that is a good day. And he's right! No matter how bad it gets, we can get through it!!

Sincerely,

Will